04 Psychotherapist
What is it Like Being a Psychotherapist?
On this episode of the Unboxing Careers Podcast, we unbox the career of a psychotherapist.
Guest: Yori Scott is a licensed professional counselor and multifaceted psychotherapist who offers a range of services tailored to the events present in your life.
Find out more about Yori at YoriScott.com
Listen to Yori’s podcast
Listen: Spotify | Apple Podcasts | Amazon Music
What we discuss:
What Psychotherapists Do
The Day-to-Day of a Psychotherapist
Balancing Work and Life in Private Practice
Advice for High School Students Interested in Therapy
Guidance for College Students Pursuing a Career in Therapy
Navigating the Counseling Field
Entering the Workforce as a Counselor
The Demand for Therapists and the Importance of Empathy
Misconceptions About Therapists
Key Psychotherapy Career Takeaways:
Psychotherapists help people with various presenting issues and use the DSM to diagnose conditions.
Common issues that psychotherapists work with include depression, anxiety, and adjustment disorders.
Yori Scott's career path involved a desire to help people, starting with education and transitioning to private practice.
The day-to-day of a psychotherapist includes consultations, sessions, notes, and research.
In private practice, work-life balance requires structure and the ability to multitask.
High school students interested in therapy should focus on communication skills, empathy, and being nonjudgmental.
College students should connect with advisors to ensure their coursework aligns with their career goals. Self-reflection and seeking guidance from mentors are crucial when entering the counseling field.
It's important to pivot if a career path doesn't align with one's goals.
When entering the workforce as a counselor, ask questions about work-life balance, caseload, and reimbursement rates.
Therapists need to be able to separate their work from their personal lives to avoid burnout.
There is a high demand for therapists, and it's important to provide access to affordable therapy.
Misconceptions about therapists include providing free advice outside of work and having perfect personal lives.
Empathy, understanding, and effective interventions are key components of therapy.
Full Interview:
Greg
Welcome everyone to the Unboxing Careers Podcast where we shed light on what different careers are really like so you can choose a career you'll really love. Today we are unboxing a career of a mental health professional, in this case specifically a psychotherapist. And this is gonna be really cool because I love therapy.
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Greg
All right, I'd like to welcome to the show, Yori Scott, psychotherapist, author, podcaster, and a whole lot more. So Yori, welcome to the Unboxing Crews podcast. Thanks for being here.
Yori Scott
Thank you so much for having me.
Greg
Glad to have you. All right, let's start with this because I'm assuming there are different specialties, not only across the healthcare or the mental health field, but specifically with psychotherapy. And you can tell me if I'm completely wrong on that, but what exactly does a psychotherapist do?
Yori Scott
Okay, so a psychotherapist helps people who are struggling with any sort of presenting issue in their life. We build relationships with people and we help them shed light on things that they may not see, providing a different perspective with the emphasis of mental health.
and we use the DSM, which is our diagnostic manual, to help guide us with diagnosing any conditions that the person may have. And a diagnosis helps people to kind of dive deep into understanding what they're struggling with, gives them perspective, it helps them connect with people who might also have the same diagnosis. And so that is.
basically in a nutshell. So, but different therapists can have different theoretical orientations that they use to help guide through the process of therapy.
Greg
So when you mention a diagnosis and different issues, can you give the audience an example of what a diagnosis might be? What an example one or some issues that you commonly work with your patients on?
Yori Scott
Definitely, depression is the number one thing that I saw through COVID. Anxiety is another one that I am seeing now anytime there is...
kind of a change in a situation where an individual has a hard time coping with, we call that adjustment disorder. That is the one that I lean mostly to because if your situation is causing you to feel depressed or sad or anxious, I don't wanna just give you a blanket diagnosis of anxiety disorder. I might use adjustment disorder with the symptoms of depression or anxiety.
Greg
Gotcha, perfect, great answer, thank you for that. Okay, so you obviously have to go to school for something like this. Talk us through your career path. Is this something you have always wanted to do? Is it something you decided on later? Did you go to college for this? Can the walk us through your evolution of wanting to be a therapist and then executing upon it.
Yori Scott
Okay. I always wanted to help people. I went into education first. I went to Georgia State University and majored in communication with the ambitions of coming out and being a teacher, educator, working with the youth. While at Georgia State University, my college roommate committed suicide and I was the one to find her. She's my why, and so I tell every client, every interview, I don't let that pass by
mentioning that because she's my why she is why mental health is so important to me and from there I moved back home and I was having a very hard time struggling with the why and the aftermath and I went into therapy and my therapist was amazing and she helped me unpack some things from my childhood and some things that were causing me issues that I didn't even know was there and so I decided to change my major went to Clark Atlanta University
in Atlanta and I did school counseling still with the the the heart of wanting to serve the youth and so I worked in charter schools in private schools and I helped middle schoolers and high schoolers kind of unpack some of their kind of some of their presenting issues you can't really get too deep into therapy in the school setting they want you really to base
use solution -focused therapy to help students because of course they need to be learning and in class. So I really was not able to really utilize my full scope until COVID hit. When COVID hit, many of my students were online and they were still reaching out. They have very, very different issues than they had in the school setting. So before as where I would deal with maybe girl drama or test anxiety in the school system, now that they were home with with their parents, some more serious things were coming up. And I really couldn't reach them the way that I wanted to. And so I had already been accumulating my hours, already kind of going through supervision because it is a different path.
to private practice than it is school counseling. And so once I passed my state licensure exam, I started seeing students in my private practice so that we could dive into some of the more concerning issues that they had.
Greg
So a couple questions for you. First, I want to say heartbreaking stories. So my heart goes out to you. It must have been a terrible experience to go through. I think it's a beautiful story in the sense that a tragedy turned into such a positive, not only in your life, but the way you're able to give back and transform other people's lives. So it's almost like a tree that keeps sprouting and spreading. So I think there's a beautiful side to the story. So thank you for sharing that.
You've always had, you mentioned the desire to help people, specifically kids or younger people. And it's gonna be a weird way to phrase it, but when you're going to school for education, which is something I initially went to school for before deciding I didn't wanna do that with my life.
Was there anything in the back of your mind before this event happened that said, hey, maybe this isn't it? Like was something always seated in the back of your mind going, maybe it was always this at the end of the day. And if not, that's fine. But if so, was that clear to you after the path you've actually gone into?
Yori Scott
Definitely. My mom would tell me from a very young age, your friends are always reaching out to you for help. People always want advice from you. She really wanted me to go into consulting. Therapy was not a big thing in my family, and so I don't know if she would have known to say therapy. But she...
always felt like, you know, hurry, you spend so much time and energy helping people, you know, comb through their issues and their problems. So it is full circle. It definitely is.
Greg
And then you mentioned the private practice versus the non -private side to things. So is there something, and this might be a conversation we'll have in a few minutes here about kind of getting into the workforce, but did you choose the path that helps students? Like, was that a cognitive, a choice, conscious choice that you made before, you know, before going into private practice or was it just kind of the random path that got you to student counseling?
Yori Scott
No, I was very intentional. I only wanted to work with middle school at first. So I knew exactly the population that I wanted to work with and I knew why. I really wanted to work with boys starting out because I wanted a nonprofit helping boys because I just felt like everything was so reactive. I didn't feel like there was enough for black boys. I felt like, you know,
back in my mom's day, she would tell me like, yeah, we had boys and girls clubs or we had like after school stuff where we could go to. And I just feel like.
Everything was very reactive. I had a nephew who was struggling and my sister couldn't find any resources for him. Everything was like, call us once he gets in juvenile. You know, that was like the sentiment. It was like, yeah, we'll help. We'll assign him a caseworker after he gets in trouble. There was nothing for him, like proactive.
Greg
Preemptively, yeah.
Yori Scott
Yeah, yeah, so I wanted to work with middle schoolers because I felt like they were at a tender age where they were still needing guidance, but they kind of went back and forth between childlike and adultlike. So they needed kind of guidance at that stage.
And then the charter school that I was in, every year they added a grade. And so we gradually, our middle schoolers gradually turned into high schoolers. And so that's how I got kind of the high school caseload, but it was very intentional. I wanted to work with middle schoolers starting out.
Greg
Yeah, that's a great story, great answer. So I love the detail here. I think you're a phenomenal person so far, and I'm sure I don't see anything changing that. So kudos to you. Okay, let's shift a little bit into what your actual day -to -day looks like. So you kind of touched on it, you kind of alluded to it here, but you know, if the day -to -day for a lot of jobs, it fluctuates, but you can kind of look through the week -to -week here. So walk someone through what you're doing, how many...you get what I'm saying, but like how many meetings, how much research, how many notes you're taking, how many sessions you're doing. Kind of walk us through that if you can.
Yori Scott
Yeah, yeah, it's gonna be really cool because I'm gonna show you how I started the private practice and how kinda everything else got added on top. So started out with just wanting to work with youth.
So I set up a website, got my license, kind of did everything that the state required. And I started advertising on Psychology Today and Instagram. I opened up my calendar and I was like, God, whoever comes, comes, right? And so I was flooded. I was.
I was absolutely flooded. My husband painted my office in our home. And I just thought, well, maybe I'll have two or three people a day. And this would be great. I'll still be working as a school counselor. And then I'll have some clients in the evening and maybe on the weekends. And this will be a great part -time job. I'll be able to help people.
So I had no intention of leaving school counseling. But to my surprise, people were really in need. Like I said, it was COVID. And so by the time the next school year began, I would have had to cancel appointments to go back into the school system. And so that's when I made the decision just to go into private practice. And then I started kind of scaling back. I began doing consultations. So step one, when someone emails me and says, hey, I need a therapist,
The first thing I do is I have a consultation with them because you want to make sure that it's a good fit. You want to make sure that what you can provide and what you can offer to the client is something that's within your scope. So we sit down over Zoom or the phone and we have a five to 10 minute consultation. If everything checks out, I send them my calendar. They're able to book. I send them new client paperwork through all of this is as developed as time has went on.
Yori Scott
But now I use an electronic HIPAA compliant system where I send their new client paperwork. And so the day comes where they're ready to meet. And we meet through a platform such as like DocsieMe or Zoom, anything that's HIPAA compliant. So I see about five clients a day, Monday through Friday, and that's scaled back. And then what happened is Instagram is the...
biggest kind of marketing tool. And then from Instagram, that's where I started really focusing on speaking. And so now with the speaking, you gotta have to weave that in the day. So my lunchtime is 12, at 12 o 'clock I usually make a few reels or do a few posts. And at night is where I do my notes. So for each client, you have to keep a note.
And I do that at night. I do research for the next day at night or on the weekend. So my day pretty much looks like session, session, session, break, session, session, break, and then back to work.
Greg
So is it a good assumption that your sessions are lasting roughly an hour give or take you know 50 minutes something like that okay so if you're doing five a day you're five hours in already not to mention a couple minutes before a couple minutes after how long typically does it take you to do a notes for say one session.
Yori Scott
It takes about 15 minutes now, right? Because you're writing kind of what the presenting issue was for today. You're reviewing what happened the last session, an assessment of how they're doing. So basically their mood, their behavior, if there's any changes from the last session. And you're writing just a quick, a few quick notes for what you want to focus on for the next session. So that when the next session comes, I'm able to quickly look at what we went over from the last time. And at night, when I go back to those notes, I'm able to put the research down there for things that I wanna adjust for the next session.
Greg
Perfect. And are you seeing patients five days a week for the most part? 40? Okay. So you're staying busy. And I'm assuming you're dealing mostly with adults now, fewer children. Yeah. So five days.
Yori Scott
Yes, right. So the teenagers I'm still able to see, but what has happened is now that I am home, the students are in school. So that was where the shift just kind of happened. So the teens who are able to have a work study or see me on lunch or Friday, some of them have a half day, I'm able to see, but I had to adjust my schedule because if I'm working during the day and they're at school during the day, then kind of hard to reach that population. So as a therapist, you do have to make shifts. You may come out saying, this is my target market. Well, if that's your target market, then you have to be willing, in order for me to have kept with teens or children, then I would have to do nights and weekends.
Greg
Yeah. So this is a good transition to kind of work -life balance. And I'm probably going to ask you this. Well, I'm not probably. I'm going to ask you this in two different respects. So private practice, work -life balance, and then non -private practice. So when you were in the school, walk us through a little bit. It could be as brief as you want, but what is the work -life balance like? So if someone wants to go into this field, what should they realistically be looking at?
Yori Scott
So private practice, the good thing is you make your own schedule, right? So I can say I no longer want to see people on Fridays. And all I would have to do is let my current clients know that my schedule is changing and block off Fridays.
I mean, it's pretty easy. I don't have anybody to ask. You know, I don't have, you know, I don't have to go to anyone, you know, vacations, you know, you just have to make sure your clients know ahead of time. And then they have to have somebody that you can, they can, you can refer them to in case of emergency. And then I can block off a whole week for vacation. So the work life balance really takes, it really takes a structured individual because you have to know how to multitask. You have to know how to keep your calendar.
You have to know how to keep track of reminders for your clients that are supposed to show up for session. There's no one to tell you what to do, when to do it. So you've got to really be able to multitask, especially with your marketing, your notes, your research. Unless you're able to hire a team, which most people don't right out the gate, you've got to really be able to multitask. But the good thing is, you know,
I can stop at two o 'clock and be in carpool. Like that was my dream. Like I always wanted to be a carpool mom because I always worked the carpool. So that's the good thing. Now the pros of non -private practice is of course your vacations, everything is set for you. You know, you have sick days that are already set for you. You know, so if you can't work, there's, you know, some stability built in already, you know, when you clock off, you're off for the day, you know, unless you have some notes to finish up, nobody's really expecting you to, you know, be on call. Whereas in private practice, if I have a client that calls right now who's in distress, you know, I have to kind of take them through a screener. It doesn't happen often.
It really, really doesn't happen often, but you kind of have to be on, you know, if I get an email, you know, in private practice,You have to be a little bit more available to answering those questions and those emails because you are doing your booking. You are doing your marketing. And so while I can do it in pajamas in my bed answering emails, there's flexibility there, but you do have to look at kind of the pros and cons. I think it takes a good three years, just like anywhere, to really feel like you are riding without training wheels.
Greg
Excellent. Let's shift a little bit to school students now. And I'm gonna start with high school and I'm gonna ask you kind of a two -parted question. The answers may be identical though. So bear with me. I ask long questions. So we're giving advice to people in high school. So let's take it from people that one, know they wanna be a therapist.
The other side to that would be people like yourself where you knew you wanted to help someone, you knew you wanted to go on some sort of services, but you didn't know therapy was your avenue of calling. What advice would you give to those students that kind of feed on both angles there about...what they could do now to kind of be successful. And this could be in terms of like a skill that is really helpful for you that practicing now to sharpen would be. It could be, hey, you know what? I took this class in high school. Had no idea it would be helpful for me, but you know what? It was. Any advice you'd offer those people.
Yori Scott
Mm -hmm. So if I were giving advice to my high school self, I would definitely say that any type of speaking courses are going to help you. Being able to do public speaking or communication classes, anything that's going to get you comfortable with both speaking and being silent, right? Because there are moments where, you know,
Silence is golden, where the client has an opportunity to process how they feel. I think another thing that really, really helped me was being able to, and I don't know if this is a class or just a skill, but being able to separate my work from my personal, right? Because it can be very heavy. It can be a very, very heavy job when you are.
when you feel like you are responsible for helping people through some of their darkest moments. And so it wasn't a class, but it's my spirituality now that I think about it. Knowing that I am just an instrument, I am not here to fix or heal, issues come through me and I...
I'm like a messenger, I give those rights to God. So being able to separate the career from your personal life is so important. I don't know what class or what you would take to get that, but that's important. Now for the person who does not know if it's for them or not, then ask yourself, do you, when people come to you and open up to you and they're vulnerable,
What is your response? Does that make you feel uncomfortable when people are vulnerable with you? Does it make you feel uneasy, caring, or keeping people's deepest secrets? Do you deem yourself as somebody who is confidential? Because those are some of, I think, the natural traits that you need. People need to be able to trust you. You need to be a good listener.
Yori Scott
And you need to be able to empathize not without judgment. Like that's a huge one. People come to you and you have to kind of meet them where they're at. And being nonjudgmental and empathetic is everything.
Greg
I think that is wonderful advice.
I think it's a hard thing for anyone to do, regardless of how old they are. I think it's especially hard for, I'm looking at my own self in high school, which is many years ago. Hard as a teenager, because you are changing, you know, attitudes change. I would say there is no shortage of someone, no shortage of drama in high school though, right? So you should have plenty of experience, or, you know, by the time you graduate, dealing with different people's feelings and coming to you as well. So I think it's something that you should certainly be mindful of that.
A lot of people don't think they're mindful of it, but if you're in high school going, okay, here's an opportunity for me to figure out how I feel here. So I think it's great advice. What a shift to college a little bit now. And if the advice is exactly the same, perfect. But generally, not always, but generally people go to college kind of deciding what they want to do. A lot of times it's not what they actually want to do. I think we both kind of attest to it in some degree, but.
Greg
You know, so what would you advise be for college students who maybe chose therapy as a career path for things, again, things they can maybe do, maybe clubs that they could join that they might not think are helpful, and then we get a lot of kids that go to college for the first two years trying to figure out what they want to do, and they're getting all those electives and things out of the way. So kind of the same question, but hear it more for your college students now.
Yori Scott
Yeah, yeah. In college, I just felt like I really wasted a lot of time. You know, like I started out, you know, taking classes that I didn't need and then felt like, you know, wow, I wish I would have had somebody guide me this way. So I would really say connect with your advisor or the counselor or the dean.
and sit down and make sure that your track is aligned to where you wanna go, right? Because every class you take is a dollar sign, you know? And I mean, it's true. You have to pay it back, you know? So you wanna make sure that you're taking classes that...
Greg
Yeah.
Yori Scott
are aligned with what you want to do. And once you decide something is not a good fit, I have so many people who say, you know, I felt like I was already close to the finish line. So I just went ahead and got my degree because I was almost done already. And then you get out and you're like, you got to go back. So.
I would say realize if something is not for you and pivot as soon as possible. But I think keeping a close connection, even going back to the high schoolers with the school counselor or the dean or the academic advisor is just so important. I would say once you get into your internship, it took me a long time to get licensed because you have to be under someone who's licensed. Like that's the caveat. You're not accumulating hours.
towards your licensure if you're working under someone who's not licensed. I wish I would have known that because that would have been a question that I would have asked in every interview that I...
Every interview that I took even when I was in education is the school counselor license because that kills two birds with one stone, right? Because if they're not licensed, once you graduate and you get into, you're trying to accumulate your hours, you have to pay somebody to sit for your hours. So if you are looking for an internship, if you're near graduation, don't be afraid to ask that in the interview.
license and will I be able to meet with you weekly so that I can accumulate my license hours. So priceless advice.
Greg
So that's a great tip and it floors me that this is not something that one, they would guide you on, but two, they would just come out and volunteer. Maybe it's because they don't want, they need help, right? And they don't want everyone to leave. So they need that, but I think that's priceless advice, right? So you paid for price of admission so far, which is free. So new to the workforce, this is gonna be different for every job and I'm really curious by this.
You know if you're going to school for marketing Do your internship you get out you just kind of put together a resume and you hope to get hired No certifications you need for that right for your field a bit different. So walk us through someone graduated college Woohoo. I'm out the door. This is what I want to do Now, how do they get into it? Is it well, I'm not gonna how did they get into the workforce? How do they differentiate themselves from others? What's that process look like?
Yori Scott
So if the good news is if you are going into non private practice, but say you want to work for an agency, a hospital, you want to work for the Department of like D facts, we're helping children, they need people right now. And so I think that you coming out with a degree in counseling and you are ready to work.
They need people, they need mental health. I mean, I get calls every day, will you come back into these departments because they really do need people. So that's the good thing right now is that you're coming into an industry where there are jobs. And so I think that that allows you to ask the questions and to really interview who you'll be working for.
Asking questions like work -life balance. Asking questions like how many will be on my caseload. Asking questions like the reimbursement rate. Because when you work for someone, you bill, but they reimburse you. So let me just give you an example. So let's say that in private practice, you charge $100 an hour. You get the full $100.
All right, let's say in private practice you take insurance. Insurance may give you $80 and they take 20, right? So in non -private practice, you get reimbursed for your hours. So you wanna know what the split is, right? Is it a, whatever, 80, 20, whatever, what is the split? And so,
I wanna empower you to ask questions that I was afraid to ask because I just was so eager and excited to get a job. I wanna empower you to ask questions about reimbursement rates. I want you to ask questions about how many will be on your caseload. I want you to ask questions, is your supervisor licensed and will I be getting hours? I want you to think five to 10 years ahead of where you are so that you're not taking a longer time to get to your goal. I think that would be my advice for somebody who's in college or graduating.
Greg
So you mentioned these things that people should be asking and looking for and things like this. So if they don't listen to this podcast, is there any place they can go and kind of find this without, like you can Google it, but you kind of have to know what you're Googling to get the answer on this, right? So are there any sort of resources, you know, that kind of cure people toward these ways or is it mostly trial by fire?
Yori Scott
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.
Definitely. No, now there's Facebook groups. I'm in several. I joined a Facebook group, private practice for teletherapists. And they have, you don't actually have to be a therapist to be in this group. You can be an intern, you can be in school. We have people posting their scores saying, I passed state board, you know, now what? So I would say Facebook has so many,
private groups that I was not privy to, but those are the most authentic forums because people are not afraid to share advice. And so I think I gain more from the private forums, people who are actually living and experiencing it, than I do Google.
Greg
That's great. I was, yeah, there and there are groups for just about everything. So I mean, I've been just about everything. Okay, let me kind of throw a hypothetical by you. So you said there's a lot of need for workers right now. So not that it'll be easy to get a job, but you have more options and say a lot of other careers have these from a timing perspective, let's say.
Yori Scott
Yeah, yeah. Mm -hmm.
Greg
There's one job, six applicants run through, you're the hiring manager on that and you can say, okay, I need to hire the therapist for this. What on their resume would you look for or during an interview would you look for that makes that one person stand out above the others?
Yori Scott
What I would look for, I probably would give each of the applicants the same scenario. And I would see who understood the presenting issue, who was able to empathize with the patient, and who was able to have the most effective interventions and strategies to help the person.
And so I am looking for three components, right? Do you get what they're going through? Do you get it? And do you get it quick, right? Because people are coming to therapy who may have never been in therapy before in their lives. It doesn't have as big of a stigma to it as it used to. Now it's like in songs and commercials and everything, but.
You know, they might be spending their last hundred dollars to come to therapy and they may never come back. Like you may ruin it for. No, I'm serious. I am literally serious. Like, like, no, I am serious. Like you ever have you ever heard of someone say, you know, I had a bad pastor and I don't go to church anymore.
Greg
No pressure, no pressure.
Yori Scott
You know, or, you know, I went to therapy work, therapy once, it doesn't work. I'm not going back. Like, seriously. So I am looking to see, do you get what they're going through? Do you get it? Do you have empathy for what they're going through? Right. And do they feel genuine empathy?
and what strategies, what are they gonna walk away with so that their lives are better than what they were before they logged on with you, right? So those are the three components.
Greg
That's phenomenal. Phenomenal. So you've touched on, I think before I transition off that, I think so role playing would be really good here, right? So you can look up, you kind of know the field you're going into or the department or whatever place you're applying to. You could obviously find.
most common scenarios and kind of role play these things yourself and figure out, you know, so it becomes a little more ingrained in you and a natural reflex. So you mentioned personality before, and I just want to kind of summarize it all together because you mentioned, hey, if you're not detail oriented, you know, private practice might not be the best thing for you, right? You mentioned being empathetic a minute ago and earlier, mentioned non-judgmental.
Greg
These are good personality traits that I think someone, if you're not good at these, you might have a more challenging time in your career, either from a happiness standpoint or just organizational standpoint.
What are some other things that people might look at either internally or just would you go, okay, if you have this personality, you're probably not a really good fit for this field or hey, you've got all the check boxes, but there's something that if you have this, even with all the check boxes, you might be really good at it. But 10 years down the road, you might be really miserable doing your job or anything you can think of off the top of your head that would fit either of those buckets.
Yori Scott
Yeah, I think if you are unable, and I think I mentioned this earlier, if you're unable to separate your work from your personal life, like if you're, and I know this, I don't know, I don't wanna use a blanket statement, but sometimes impacts, you know, impacts feel other people's emotions so heavily that it impacts them, right? And they carry it with them and it feels really heavy for them.
And so if you are not able to separate, because if you have someone crying and you're deeply impacted, and I mean it happens, you tear up, but if you're falling to pieces with every client, you can't be effective. You can't be effective. If you...
put yourself in people's shoes to the point where you're sympathizing and you're no longer empathizing and you can't be effective, right? And then you'll burn out. You will burn out. And so I think that's the biggest one. And I see it across different fields like social workers, you know.
911 operators, police officers, any field where you really have to be close to a person's vulnerability, you have to be able to separate, separate so that you can be effective.
Greg
And some people might hear that and say, you need to be empathetic, but you need to separate. And sometimes that separation could come across as like, you need to be cold -hearted a little more, right? A little more stoic maybe is a better word. What I'm hearing is there just needs to be a little more of a balance, right? You could be empathetic, you need to be empathetic, but you also need to know, you need to know when the empathy...has you hit the wall for it right and then professional kicks in.
Yori Scott
Yeah.
Right, right. So like research the difference between sympathy and empathy, right? So like that would be a clear distinction of the two where like sympathy, you feel bad for them and you pity them and you know, can't really do that. Really, we're trying to empower people to be and live their best lives, right? We're not sitting there sympathizing like, that's.
That sucks for you, you know.
Greg
Very good. How about a misconception about your job?
Yori Scott
misconception is that in our social lives, we also like to provide therapy to friends and family. Not true. Not true, not true, not true. Like when we're off work, we do not wanna sit around and listen to our friends and families. It's used for hours and hours and hours. No, no, no, no, no.
Greg
I did see that.
Yori Scott
big misconception. Misconception is that because we know better, we should do better. Nope, I have a therapist, it's part of my self care. I'll always have a therapist. So just because we know what to do textbook wise doesn't mean that it's easy for our personal lives. So a lot of us seek support.
because we need support, we're pouring out and so we need an opportunity to be able to have support. So I think it's good for any therapist to have a therapist. Misconception is that our children are perfect because we give them tips and strategies. Nope, not true. We're regular people, we're regular problems. And so I think, yeah, those are a few.
Greg
All right, two questions. I need you to be completely honest with me here. All right, so you don't like giving your friends free advice off work, which I completely get. Do you ever sit around like a dinner table and they're talking and you're thinking to yourself? Like, do you ever analyze what they're doing? All right, this is probably more applicable to family. You get families together.
Greg
You ever sit there and listen and talk and just think to yourself, God, you need therapy. You got to go in there.
Yori Scott
Yep. But we don't say it. We don't say it because it's like everybody's waiting for you to say it so they can say, you're not right there. But, you know, so it's like you don't, you just sit there and you, you know, you, you put on a different hat. Like you take off the work hat and you put on the friend hat or the sister hat or the mom hat. You know, you've got to be, that's a good one. Going back to like, you know, tips for the students is, you know, just being able to take off the hat and put on another hat when need be.
Greg
So I really love the advice as well about, you know, just cause you know better doesn't mean you do better and seeking support outside as well. Even if it's just for, like, I've had friends go to therapy for years. I go to therapy. I think it's immensely helpful. But I love the advice here and I'll give you a quick story as we're close to wrapping up. So.
I had a long time dermatologist here and love the guy. Right. He was great. We chit chat thorough, you know, he's caught stuff and then we're talking one day and he's talking about, you know, potentially retiring or moving. And I, and I go, I go, well, well, who'd you go to? Right. Cause I'm going to need to replace this guy at some point. Right. So he looks at me and he's like, this is really bad to say, Greg. He goes, I don't have a guy, but I really do need one because I've got a bunch of moles and I'm like, here we go. So I found the new one, but not via recommendation, but it's a really good example of he knows better, but he doesn't do it, right? So he needs to go there. So I think it's really good advice. So long story.
Yori Scott
Yeah. Thanks.
Greg
All right, so you've answered, I'm gonna ask you the question anyways in case something else came to your mind. This last one, well not the last one, but the last one really on this one. You've given three to four answers on this already. And it's what about your industry do you wish you knew sooner? And you gave advice about, I wish I knew what to ask these questions or an internship and I wish I knew this. Anything that maybe you neglected that jumps off to you that people should know?
Yori Scott
What I wish I knew sooner is how many people are looking for a therapist and can't find one. That's what I would have probably been in the field a long time ago. You know, when I hear people say, I have a therapist but her wait list is...X amount of time or, you know, I have a therapist but they don't accept insurance anymore, you know, and I, you know, and I'm paneled on insurance and I will always be paneled on insurance because I do want to serve a population who needs, who's in need and needs access to affordable therapy. And so in the African-American community, there are not many women of color. And so. I wish I would have known how many people need therapy and been able to help more people sooner.
Greg
I tell you what, even if you have insurance, it is still hard to find someone, especially if someone that is not on, like you said, like a three, four month wait list. It is on canning. And then you have people that can't afford it without the insurance. So good for you for all you do. That's a, it's phenomenal.
Yori Scott
Thank you. Thank God.
Greg
One last question before you hear. You can't be a therapist. And I'm gonna take teacher out of the equation too, because you mentioned you took this, all right? I got you. All right, you have to choose a different career that you think you'd be happy in. What career do you think you'd choose?
Yori Scott
How did you know I was gonna say that? Okay.
Okay, can't be a therapist, can't be a teacher. I would be a speaker.
Greg
Okay, and why?
Yori Scott
Okay, I would be a speaker because I feel like I could still get a message across to people who need to hear whatever God puts on my heart, that message is, and I still would be able to use my voice to help people heal. See, a sneak attack. You're supposed to take that one off the table too.
Greg
There you go. I love it. So next time we talk, I am. You're done. All right. So, Yori, thank you for your time today. It's a pleasure. Love the insight. You were just phenomenal. And God bless you for all you do. You're just an inspiration, I think, to a lot of people.
Yori Scott
Thank you
Greg
You're welcome.I deserve nothing here though so you've had you've turned a really bad experience into something so positive and I think you should be commended for that so thank you very much I'm gonna try to get your name a hundred percent here I'm gonna butcher it but I'm turning to you Yori I just butchered that didn't I say it for everyone
Yori Scott
Okay.Yori Scott
Yep, you got it. Yori Ayola Scott. So yes, yes.
Greg
Yori Scott, everyone, psychotherapist, author, podcaster, just all over the place. To find out more about Yori and everything she's up to, you can visit Yori Scott .com. Other links also found in the show description or the notes, however you're consuming this. So please check there for spellings in case you're not sure how to do it. But I hope you enjoyed today's episode.
If you would like to unbox your career with us, we'd love to have you.
(Interview transcription provided by Riverside.fm. May not be 100% accurate.)
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